I can't stop thinking about my seminary lesson on Thursday. I taught about the destruction of Sodom and Gommorah, but the part of the lesson that I can't stop thinking about is Lot's wife. When Lot, his wife and two daughters left Sodom, they were given clear and precise counsel. Do NOT look back! Lot's wife did not follow that counsel. She looked back and was turned into a pillar of salt. Why did she look back? We don't know for sure, but I have learned so many things from her looking back and have my own theories about it. The first thing that comes to mind is that she couldn't leave what she thought at the time was such a good thing. She didn't believe or have faith that what the Lord had in store for her was going to be so much better than what she was leaving behind. I know that sometimes in my life when one door is closed I find myself banging on that door because I want to go back. It was comfortable there. I don't want to move into the unknown. I just want to stay in my old place even though the new place probably will be better than the old place every could be. I need to remember that the Lord loves me and wants me to be happy. He is the one in charge here and his plan is much grander than mine! The other lesson I have learned from her example is to let go of the things in my past that are holding me back. Stop looking back at the things I have done in my life that I regret, the mistakes I have made. Stop digging up all the junk. Stop reliving the "what should have been" or the "what if's". We have to forgive ourselves of the mistakes we have made and let them live in the past! We have to stop digging up all the trash that has already been buried! When I really think about it, that old trash is valuable because every regret has put me right where I need to be now. Were they painful... yes! Did I learn something! YES... every single time! Do I want to go back there? Heck no! I want to bury those things and not EVER have to go back there again. We need to be kinder to ourselves and to others around us. The Lord has forgiven us of our mistakes. It seems like if the Lord of All, the Mediator, the Savior of my soul has paid the price for my sin, the least I could do is not carry it around and pull it out every so often and shine it up and put it back in my backpack for another day. Forgiving ourselves and others is so key in the process of healing but I think we forget that step! Being kind to our self is so important. In fact, it is the second great commandment. The first great commandment is to love the Lord God. The second is the Love thy neighbor as thyself! We always forget the second part... to love thyself! Taking care of our self is as important as taking care of others. One vital part of taking care of our self is to forgive ourselves of the past mistakes! I am so grateful for a loving God who sometimes has to hit me over the head to learn things OR allows me days to ponder on a lesson in seminary! I hope my kids are learning as much as I am!
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